The Time I Knew What Happiness Was
by ThePhantomRunnerOfLesMiserable
Summary: What happened before the events of the musical took place? Why did Macavity become evil, or how did Grizabella become 'the glamour' cat?
1. Chapter 1

**I recently got obsessed with Cats, and mind keeps wondering to Grizabella and her whole back story. This is my first Cats fanfiction, so if it is totally awful I'd love to know ;) **

She stretched, waking her mind, and blinking her eyes. She rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling of her den. Her mind was racing, and she could barely keep up. She loved them, with all her heart soul and mind, but she wanted more. He mother always told her that she was destined for greatness, and she believed that. Staying here with the Jellicle's was a plentiful life, she had everything she needed.

Needing and wanting mere two different things. She had everything she needed. She just wanted more. And she got everything she wanted.

She stretched again standing up and sashaying over to her mirror. She fluffed her head fur, grooming herself. She was a very pretty queen. She was a cream color, with brown and black stripes. She was of medium size, with voluptuous hips and a small curved waist. She pushed her shoulders back, standing up strait, and walked out of her den.

She was a beautiful cat, and she knew it. She felt like she would be able to do anything in the world outside the junkyard. She knew she would be successful. She wanted a life of glamour. Everyone here loved her, the toms wanted her, the queens wanted to be her. Why would it be any different behind the yard?

"Good morning, Bella!" Grizabella turned around

"Hey, Jenny," She turned to see her friend, Jennyanydots, walking up to her.

Jenny was one of her good friends, They had become queens a few years ago, Jenny was a little shorted than Griz, and a little rounder too. Nevertheless, Jenny was cheerful and a bit protective even to those older than her. It was rather overbearing.

"Slow down, your going too fast! Where are you off to in such a hurry, anyway?" Jenny asked jogging to keep up with Grizabella.

"I'm not in a hurry. I'm just walking" Grizabella stated simply

Jenny chattered on about mice, knitting, and Skimbleshanks, but Grizabella was hardly listening

"And then I told him-"

"Jen." She stopped walking suddenly. Jennyanydots turned around in confusion, "You like it here don't you?"

Jenny looked at her nervously "Yes. Of course I do. Why would you ask something so silly?"

Grizabella started waking again "I don't know." She pawed at the ground impatiently

"Don't you like it here?" Jenny asked

"Of course. I love it here. But don't you think there is something more out there?"

"It would only make sense that there was something more out there. The world would be awfully tiny if it was just the Junkyard."

"Do you ever want to leave?" Grizabella asked, but she already knew the answer. Jennyanydots never left he yard, unless she was going to visit her humans of course.

"Heavens no!" She looked at Grizabella in horror "Bella, do you know what kinds of things could be out there? All sorts of things that are dangerous to cats. Bella. Darling. Do me a favor and don't try to escape,"

"I wasn't planning on it" She murmured

"You are such a dear." She paused "Now what was I saying?"

Grizabella huffed "You most defiantly weren't talking about Skimble's 'beautiful' green eyes...," she said sarcastically

"Oh right!" Jenny laughed "As I was saying, I told him..."

Grizabella rolled her eyes. She didn't know why Jenny was so attached to Skimbleshanks. Sure he was nice, but she didn't get how a queen could be attached to only one tom.

Grizabella suddenly tripped. "Good Heavyside, Bella!" Jenny gasped "What happened?"

"I fell, Jen," she deadpanned dryly. Grizabella just sat there, staring off into space as if she hadn't just tripped and landed on her tush.

"Where is your mind at today?" Jenny asked. Her friend wasn't one to fall and if she did she did, she would not have just sat there.

When Grizabella gave no answer, Jenny sighed and offered her a hand. "Grizabella, please don't tell me your thinking about... what you said earlier?"

Grizabella accepted Jenny's hand and stood up, brushing herself off.

"Fine, then I won't tell you," She put her nose high in the air. She picked up her speed swaying her hips back and forth.

Jenny sighed again as she jogged to keep up. She wondered what was going on in that pretty little head of Bella's. What had made her even think about leaving the junkyard? She worried about her sometimes

**Thanks for reading! I would love to know what you thought! **


	2. Chapter 2

Grizabella was lying on her back, Jellylorum and Jennyanydots on either side of her. She rolled into her stomach, then sat back on her hind legs.

"Jelly," she started "what would you do if I said I was going to leave the yard?"

Jellylorum stared at her, waiting for her to say that she was joking.

"Not this again," Jenny groaned burring her face in her paws.

"I guess I'd say you were a bit crazy," Jelly shrugged. She continued to stare at her "Then I'd ask you why?"

Grizabella blinked, not expecting that answer. "That's a good question. A great response..."

"What would you say?" Jelly and Jenny looked at her expectantly.

"I'm sure I'd say that I didn't know. Maybe I'd say that I want a change," she looked at Jelly's confused face and Jenny's annoyed one. "Girls. There has to be more out there!"

"What about your human's?" Jenny suggested "Go visit them for a while. Maybe it will leave you refreshed when you come back."

"Jen, I think we both know that if I leave the Junkyard, I'm not going to come back," Grizabella looked at the sky lazily

"I don't see why you would want to leave. Everyone here is kind to you you have enough to eat, you have a place to sleep, you have your overall health," Jenny gestured to her ailing mother "You've got toms that would die for you, you've got **friends** that adore you. That sounds like a pretty good life, if you ask me. What do you think, Jelly?"

"Sound peachy. I would live that life over mine if I could. Bella, what else could you possibly want?"

Grizabella pawed at the dirt for a minute before looking at Jelly directly in the eyes. "More," she whispered

Jennyanydots stood up with a huff of frustration. "You sound mighty ungrateful, Grizabella. You sound ungrateful, inconsiderate, ignorant, selfish, greedy, rude, unappreciative, vain, and self-centered!" She stomped away in anger

Jelly sighed "Are you actually thinking about leaving, Bell?

Grizabella rolled her eyes in annoyance "Yes. I actually think about leaving. It's not like I'm going to do it. Like how you like to think about mating with Asparagus, but you never actually do it,"

Jellylorum stifled a grin as she turned red under her cream colored fur. She smacked Grizabella playfully on the arm.

"Grizabella." Jellylorum said, suddenly serious "Don't leave okay? It would be awfully lonely without you. Who else would I be able to talk with about not being able to mate with Asparagus?"

Grizabella smiled softly "You could always talk with Jenny. She likes to talk about mating."

Jelly looked at her intently "Okay?" She pressed

Grizabella nodded slowly "Okay, Jells."

"And besides, I think Deuteronomy would miss you to much," Jelly grinned devilishly

And Grizabella did like Deuteronomy. He was mature, kind, and easy to talk to. They often talked together, it was usually about things that they had picked up from their humans, that no other cats would understand. Unfortunately, he was already mated under his fathers orders to a lovely queen named Calpurnia. Half the time she was nice, the other half she acted crazy and out of it.

"I guess I'd miss him too," Grizabella said "Although, I'm not sure how I could be stuck to only one tom,"

Jellylorum sighed "Don't say that. It makes you sound very kittenish,"

Grizabella stood up and smiled "Oh, Jells. I just want to have a little bit of fun," she grinned again before casually sauntering off and began flirting with a tom.

Out of the three of them Jenny, Jelly, and Bella, Grizabella was the oldest. Out of the three of them, Grizabella was also the least mature, modest and grateful.

**how is it? The chapters that are to come will be less about Grizabella, and more about why the junkyard it is the way it is during the events of the musical. Let me know on anything that I could change or improve on!**


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